OLD-FASHIONED CHIVALROUS ROMANCE 101 – A GUIDE
One of the main focuses here at The Silver Petticoat Review is old-fashioned chivalrous romance in entertainment. But what do we mean by chivalrous romance in a modern world?
Old-fashioned chivalrous romance is something many of us love – but don’t even have a definition for. We’ve put this guide out there to fill the void and will take you through definitions and detailed checklists to answer that question.
You may be a writer looking for guidance and inspiration or a romance fan looking for a greater understanding. Well, you’ve come to the right place.
WHAT IS OLD-FASHIONED CHIVALROUS ROMANCE?
We define old-fashioned chivalrous romance as a storytelling technique using chivalry and classic romance tropes to tell a love story.
We define old-fashioned chivalrous romance as a storytelling technique using chivalry and classic romance tropes to tell a love story. Whether in books, film, TV, or even theater, the storyteller uses an old-fashioned approach (or is, in fact, an “old” classic like an Austen novel) to showcase a swoony, emotional romance.
However, we should point out that “old-fashioned chivalric” love stories don’t necessarily have to exist within an old-fashioned story (although many do)—for example, the love story between Cornelia and Eli in the recent limited series, The English. The TV show includes violence and a modern filmmaking style – but the love story itself is inspired by Old Hollywood romantic epics – and uses old-fashioned chivalric techniques.
These chivalric and old-fashioned romance tropes make many love stories admired and influential! Whether it’s Mr. Darcy’s love confessions, Mr. Thornton willing Margaret to “look back” at him as she leaves him behind, Johnny pulling Baby up to the stage to dance with him in front of everyone, or even Jack giving Rose the world’s most epic kiss on the Titanic.
The audience and fans remember these moments, love them, and even watch them on repeat!
The lack of these classic romance moments (mixed with bad scripts and filmmaking) in many stories today has hurt the romance genre in the entertainment industry. On the other hand, romance in the publishing industry continues to thrive.
Thankfully, we’re currently experiencing a romance resurgence in entertainment thanks to Hallmark, Netflix, and other streaming sites. However, many (not all) need better quality to be more memorable. Thus, it’s essential to create quality love stories and remember what makes a love story unforgettable.
So, let’s get started!
Below, we include some background information, a detailed checklist for old-fashioned chivalrous romance in entertainment, and a list of what it isn’t. Beyond that, we have some examples to get you started in the storytelling world of chivalrous love. Then, answer a couple of questions for clarification.
RELATED The Appeal of the Old-Fashioned Romance
WHAT DOES OLD-FASHIONED MEAN?
Before moving on to the checklist, we want to investigate some background information to clarify the old-fashioned chivalrous romance style! So, first, we need to know the definition of old-fashioned.
Let’s take a look.
According to the English Oxford Dictionary:
In or according to styles or types no longer current or common; not modern.
According to Dictionary.com:
Having the…tastes of earlier times
And according to Merriam-Webster:
Of, relating to, or characteristic of a past era
If we combine all these definitions, we end up with styles, tastes, and characteristics of a past era. Thus, old-fashioned romance is either “of” the past or influenced by it.
As a contemporary example, if you insert some of these characteristics and classic romance tropes into a modern story, you have old-fashioned romance! The perfect example? Kate and Leopold. The film brings a man with the styles, tastes, and characteristics of a past time (because he’s from the past) into the present day.
Now, we know that sometimes, old-fashioned has negative connotations. People think “stuffy,” “outdated,” and “boring.” But really, what’s boring about Mr. Darcy?
Rather, what we mean by old-fashioned romance is that a story uses classic romance tropes to tell a compelling, authentic love story within numerous genres rather than focusing on overly modern trends that often lead to anti-romances masquerading as romances.
Not to mention this horrid trend of the anti-HEA (happily ever after) to be “original” and “trendy.” Just NO! If you don’t like romance, don’t write a romance! That’s not to say a romance can’t be a romantic tragedy – it can. But it shouldn’t be anti-romance, promoting itself as the opposite.
What does chivalrous mean?
Now, let’s examine the definition and origin of “chivalrous” and “chivalry.” The English Oxford Dictionary defines chivalry as:
The medieval knightly system with its religious, moral, and social code.
So, in the context of a romantic style, chivalry can be seen as behavior relating to a code of conduct. The sub-definitions of chivalry go further:
The combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight, namely courage, honour, courtesy, justice, and a readiness to help the weak.
Courteous behaviour, especially that of a man towards women.
Finally, it’s essential to explore the origins. The English Oxford Dictionary explains that the origin of the word chivalry and chivalrous dates back to “Late Middle English (in the sense ‘characteristic of a medieval knight’): from Old French chevalerous, from chevalier.”
The Roots of Chivalrous Romance
Many may not know that romance, as we understand it today, is primarily owed to the chivalric knights and troubadours of the medieval age.
Arguably, one of the first “romance novels” wasn’t technically a novel but a legend that was eventually written down. The famous love story of Tristan and Isolde, an influential romance from the 12th century, tells the tragic star-crossed love story between the knight Tristan and the Irish princess, Isolde.
This story, the courtly love between Knights and Ladies, and the poems of the troubadours (French Medieval Lyric Poets) influenced the future of romance in entertainment and life.
As Joseph Campbell explains, troubadours were “the first ones in the West that really considered love in the sense that we think of it now, as a person-to-person relationship.”
So, how can we appreciate romance today without understanding and appreciating where it came from? One of the most successful qualities of great romances includes chivalrous behavior from men and women.
One Main Romance Influence = Jane Austen and the Domestic Revolution
Other significant influences of the contemporary, old-fashioned, chivalrous romance style include classic fairy tales, folklore, Jane Austen, the Brontë sisters, other vintage romances, classic movies, and even romantic period dramas. However, when we think about the primary influence, it comes down to Jane Austen, who revolutionized romance.
According to Princeton Professor April Alliston in the documentary Love Between the Covers, Jane Austen, “domesticated romance.” In the same documentary, Sarah Lyons of The Popular Romance Project said:
One of the things that she did, was the first woman to do, was argue that men need to deserve their companion just as much as women need to deserve their companion. And so Elizabeth has to change, absolutely, she has to lose her prejudice towards Darcy. But, it’s called Pride and Prejudice and Darcy needs to change too. And I think that that is one of the things that Austen did before anyone else. And she made it almost a requirement because her books became the structural foundation of the domestic novels. It moved through the 19th and 20th century because she became the icon…of domestic novels and the marriage plot.
During the Age of Enlightenment in the 18th century, people began marrying for love more often, which would have inspired Jane Austen and her ideas of equality and love. And it’s Jane Austen who influences all romance in stories today.
But with today’s focus on hookup culture, casual dating, and other emotionless ways of romancing in stories, we risk returning to the days of romance without love in both entertainment and life.
So, like Jane Austen, we want to participate in a new Romantic Revolution that uses elements of old-fashioned romance and chivalry for a modern world. We want love stories (in all genres) of equality with authentic romance, emotion, service, and chivalry.
With this style, we’re promoting the idea that love and romance in stories should not only exist (romance is not anti-feminist, as some argue), but they should also be EMOTIONAL and about human connection. To do that, we believe there must be more chivalrous romances.
Focusing on classic romance and chivalrous tropes will make love stories universally appealing, helping the romance resurgence grow!
We’re not saying there shouldn’t be other romance styles; we should just welcome the variety!
OLD-FASHIONED CHIVALROUS ROMANCE CHECKLIST – AS DEFINED BY US:
Every love story does not have to include every one of these elements, but it should consist of some of them.
- Focus on soul connection rather than shallow attraction.
- Love over lust. However, there can still be attraction and passion, but not without love.
- Focus on emotional growth rather than sex. Not that sex is absent – just that when used, it’s necessary to the story and not too graphically depicted.
- A meeting of the minds.
- The romantic duo is often kindred spirits.
- It may include two characters so alike in spirit that they become one and can sometimes feel each other (especially when in danger) from across great distances. (This one’s rare!)
- Smoldering Stares
- Swoon-worthy romantic moments (could be saving each other in non-damsel in distress fashion; i.e., the female’s not a whimpering fool though she and he can both be protected by the other).
- It may include grand gestures.
- Obstacles might be keeping them apart.
- A touch of the hand is powerful. As is a hug. Or a dance. Or the touch of a cheek.
- They have deep conversations.
- A kiss is emotional and romantic, often with some build-up.
- The male heroes ‘usually’ (definite exceptions) have old-fashioned manners of some kind (though he can still seem rude or arrogant: think of Darcy, for instance, or just plain villainous like Heathcliff, who returns like a devil in well-mannered disguise).
- Chivalry’s not dead.
- While contemporary stories can “live” in the modern world, old-fashioned romance is not focused heavily on modern dating trends (though some of those can still use chivalric elements and make the cut—You’ve Got Mail is genius!).
- The story’s typically more than just about romance. All the great love stories have other themes and subplots interweaved into the story. The romance also must feel like something other than an afterthought and an add-on. Usually, romance is essential to the actual story.
- There should be a happily ever after unless it’s a romantic tragedy.
- Layered characters worth reading or watching.
- Characters can have all kinds of backgrounds and histories and various types of personalities and flaws – including disturbing ones. This approach to characterization means female characters can be more than just the “strong” female characters with unusual abilities. She can also be soft, innocent, selfish, troubled, etc. Or a male character can be a Byronic Hero or incredibly dark. It’s not about “who” someone is but how the writer/director presents the story. A significant transformation may occur, or a love story may be presented as an unhealthy example.
- Romance doesn’t need to be “realistic” or “healthy.” We’re more concerned about if it’s part of a good story. Romeo and Juliet or Wuthering Heights aren’t about healthy romances, but they’re both incredible stories and engaging to read or watch.
- There is genuine, honest love with real-world problems. Helping someone overcome an addiction or working through a troubled marriage is also very romantic, as is supporting an older man’s sickly wife every day.
- Love is about work and what you’re willing to do for someone else – so sacrifice is another common element in old-fashioned chivalrous romance.
- Unrequited romance – meaning one-sided – is acceptable. Dickens was an expert with this type of story.
- Elements of optimism; non-cynical in its romantic approach; embraces romance unabashedly.
- It shows respect for both men and women.
- There is commitment and a single-minded focus. No wandering eye here – unless there’s a transformation!
- It may include archetypal aspects of fairy tales.
- Old-fashioned, chivalrous romance is for everyone! That means we’re all about equality and diversity within stories.
- It is steeped in good storytelling and of high quality.
Technically, any genre can tell a story with old-fashioned chivalrous romance attached. Scully and Mulder from The X-Files are a perfect example. Sometimes (especially with TV shows), filmmakers can use chivalrous romance in one episode and not the next. Or in movies – in one scene but not the next.
We’re interested in discussing and promoting old-fashioned chivalrous romance in a movie, book, or show – even if it doesn’t last! However, we’re MORE interested in content that regularly explores old-fashioned chivalrous romance rather than making it the exception. Yes, our kindred spirits are BBC Period Dramas based on classic novels and K-Dramas!
What Old-Fashioned Chivalrous Romance Isn’t:
- Overly explicit.
- It includes unnecessary nudity in a non-artistic way.
- The story is excessively vulgar, raunchy, profane, or crude.
- The story consists of unnecessary objectification of men or women: Anti-women and steeped in misogynistic culture.
- Romance is based on lust.
- It focuses too heavily on overly modern dating tropes without being necessary to the story or thematic purpose: contemporary dating elements of casual hookups, negative aspects of online dating (swiping left when someone isn’t good-looking enough), hanging out instead of going on dates, passive-aggressive communication, or the complete lack thereof.
- The stories have an antagonistic attitude toward love stories and romance.
- It lacks human connection and emotional bonds between two people.
- Unemotional.
- It doesn’t stay true to the characters.
- There is no build-up or proper character or romantic development.
ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON OLD-FASHIONED CHIVALROUS ROMANCE
The old-fashioned, chivalrous romance genre is in danger of becoming extinct in modern entertainment. So, we aim to bring old-fashioned chivalrous romance back by promoting the stories that embrace it, from the sweeping, epic romances like Titanic to the classic love stories of Jane Austen, to the unabashedly romantic international dramas, to the witty romantic comedies, to great literature that makes our hearts skip a beat and more. And all without continuous explicit content and crude depictions.
Old-fashioned chivalrous romance is like the butterflies you felt in your stomach when you had your first crush. Or the time you felt the wonder of first love in your heart. It makes you smile or cry and believe in true love, fairy tales, and happily ever after.
It’s like when you were a teenager and stayed up reading a good book all night because you had to know the ending. It’s about emotions, feeling deeply, and what’s on the inside, not the outside.
Old-fashioned chivalrous romance is like the silly fantasies you had as a teenager about the popular guy or the pop star swooping in and asking you to the school dance—and all in grand, ridiculous fashion.
Yes, some may argue that old-fashioned chivalrous romance is unrealistic and dangerous. However, we take the opposite view. Like a good fairy tale, old-fashioned chivalrous romance and depictions of soul love present an optimistic message.
Even if some of these stories are “unrealistic,” they teach us something real, even if shown in a fantastical setting. That love exists. And it’s okay to embrace optimism, the joys of life, and our child-like dreams even in the darkest times.
In The Uses of Enchantment: The Meaning and Importance of Fairy Tales, psychologist Bruno Bettelheim on the message/lesson of fairy tales (to which old-fashioned chivalrous romance relates), said: “…a struggle against severe difficulties in life is unavoidable, is an intrinsic part of human existence – but that if one does not shy away, but steadfastly meets unexpected and often unjust hardships, one masters all obstacles and at the end emerges victorious.”
Fantastically said. Besides, we say, why does romance have to be dead? Can’t equality and chivalry exist side by side?
Sure, we know an immortal vampire or a Doctor in a blue box isn’t going to swoop in and save us from the ordinary hardships of life. Or believe that life is actually like a romantic comedy. Not that there’s anything wrong with taking a stand and saying, “You know what? I would like to have respect and consideration and deep conversations.” It’s not unfair to ask for loyalty, honesty, and real love.
But sometimes, a good old-fashioned love story is meant to cheer us up when we’re having a hard time or a bad day!
In a modern world, good old-fashioned chivalrous romance in entertainment is often looked down upon, even though many of us secretly (or not so secretly) love it. Well, it’s time to bring back the romance in all its glory. Everything old becomes new again, after all.
If you’re new to old-fashioned chivalrous romance or would like some good reminders or recommendations, we have compiled a list of great examples that are a good starting point. These lists are not comprehensive; they are just a few good examples.
A FEW EXAMPLES OF OLD-FASHIONED CHIVALROUS ROMANCE IN LITERATURE
- Austenland by Shannon Hale
- Edenbrooke: A Proper Romance by Julianne Donaldson
- Emily of New Moon Trilogy by L.M. Montgomery
- Emily Wilde’s Encyclopaedia of Faeries by Heather Fawcett
- The Ghost Bride by Yangsze Choo
- Grand Sophy by Georgette Heyer
- The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society by Annie Barrows and Mary Ann Shaffer
- Isabelle and Alexander by Rebecca Anderson
- Jane Austen Society by Natalie Jenner
- Jane Austen’s books. Our personal favorites are Persuasion and Pride and Prejudice.
- Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte
- North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell
As a note, several classics have old-fashioned chivalrous romance interweaved into the story. There are many more modern ones out there as well!
A FEW EXAMPLES OF OLD-FASHIONED CHIVALROUS ROMANCE IN MOVIES
- An Affair to Remember
- Becoming Jane
- Belle
- Bend it Like Beckham
- Casablanca
- Cinderella (2015)
- City Lights
- Crazy Rich Asians
- Ever After
- Kate & Leopold
- La Belle et La Bete
- The Lake House
- The Little Mermaid
- Mansfield Park (1999)
- Mr. Malcolm’s List
- Notorious (1946)
- Now, Voyager
- Penelope
- Pride and Prejudice (2005)
- The Princess Bride
- Sleepless in Seattle
- Strictly Ballroom
- A Walk to Remember
- You’ve Got Mail
Old-fashioned chivalrous romance is easy to find in period dramas, classic films, fairy tale adaptations, and romantic comedies. However, this is not an exhaustive list; it is just a few good examples.
A FEW EXAMPLES OF OLD-FASHIONED CHIVALROUS ROMANCE IN TV SHOWS & MINISERIES
- Anne of Green Gables & Anne of Avonlea (1985; 1987)
- Chuck
- Dark Angel
- A Discovery of Witches
- Doctor Who (2005)
- Downton Abbey
- The English
- Gilmore Girls
- Grand Hotel (2013)
- The Hour
- Jane Eyre (2006)
- La Femme Nikita
- Lost
- The Master’s Sun
- The Mentalist
- Merlin
- Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries
- Miss Scarlet and the Duke
- Moonlight
- North and South (2004)
- The Originals
- The Paradise
- Poldark (2015)
- Pride and Prejudice (1995)
- Pushing Daisies
- Roswell
- Sanditon
- Sweet Magnolias
- The Vampire Diaries
- Victoria
- The X- Files
Many of these shows focus on old-fashioned, chivalrous romance. But some shows don’t make it the focus. For example, CW’s The Originals is more about immortal vampire siblings than their love lives – even though that’s also important. The story of Klaus and Camille presents a great example of an old-fashioned romantic love story.
ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS
Does a film/book/show need to be a romance to be an old-fashioned, chivalrous romance?
No. Old-fashioned chivalrous romance can be found in any category or genre.
What if an explicit bedroom scene is in a movie or TV show? Or it’s R-rated or TV-MA? Does that automatically exclude it?
No. Old-fashioned, chivalrous romance can be in mature content and is not necessarily “clean.” Look at Outlander and Bridgerton as examples.
But generally, old-fashioned, chivalrous romance is less steamy. But there are exceptions to every rule! We consider a love story on a holistic scale – but it’s all in good fun anyway. Not every romance needs to be old-fashioned and chivalrous to be great.
For more about The Silver Petticoat Review, see our ABOUT, ROMANTIC LIVING 101, and our MODERN ROMANTICISM 101 GUIDE for answers to more questions! If you have any other questions about old-fashioned, chivalrous romance, please don’t hesitate to message us!